funny pati patni joke in hindi

Funny Pati Patni Joke 

Wife: jab aap chashma utaarte ho, bahut handsome dikte ho.
Husband: haa dear, jab main chashma utaarta hoo, tum bhi bahut khoobsoorat dikti ho

Wife: suniye, hum is hafte poora cinema dekhenge, agle hafte poora shopping karenge.
Husband: uske baad ke hafte poora mandir jaayenge
Wife: kyu?
Husband: bheek maangne ke liye

Husband: agar operation mein mujhe kuch hua to tum us doctor se hi shaadi kar lena.
Wife: aise kyu bol rahe ho?
Husband: usse badla lene ka doosra tareeka nahi hai.

Wife: aji, koi peeche mere pair choo rahaa hai.
Husband: peeche mud ke apna chehra dikha, woh choonaa bandh kar dega

Wife: aapse milne doctorji aaye hai
Husband: mujhe bukhaar hai. unhe kal aane ke liye bolo

Husband: tum khaana bahut achchi banaati ho
Wife: tum jitna bhi maska lagaao, khaana tumhe hee banaanaa padega

patni-mai driver k naukri se nikal rhi hu kyuki mai aj dusari bar marte marte bachi hu...
.
pati-plz darling,use ek mauka aur deno na.....plzzz


Bhakt-
Bhagwaan main Paapi hoon!
Mujhe dard do,
Dukh do,
Mujhe barbaad kar do,
Pareshaani do,
Mujhe truck se kuchal do,
Mujhe Mount Everst ki choti se gira do,
Mere peechhe bhoot laga do!
Bhagawaan- abe 1 Line mein bol na ki biwi chaahie!

kit-kit ki aavaaz aa rahi thi.,
Patni: dekho ji, choohe kapade kutar rahe hain.,
Pati (kaampate hue): saari rajai jo tune kheench li,
mere hi daant kitakita rahe hain.

Chunav Lad Rahi Mahila Se
Reporter Ne Pucha-
Apko Chunav Ladne Ka
Khayal Kaise Aya
Lady- Jab B Me Apne Pati Se Ladti Hu To Jeet Meri Hi Hoti Hai

Santa - "Dekh teri Wife ko saanp(Snake) kaat raha hai"
Banta - "abe vo kaat nahin raha,
usaka jahar khatam ho gaya hai to vah
Recharge karavaane aaya hai..."

"Adabhut Sach" Duniya ke 90% purusho ka Sukun un mahilao ne chheena hai...
jinake naam ke aakhiri mein ...A, I, N, M, Y, L ya U aata hai...
yadi vishvaas na ho to apani patni ke naam se tasalli kar lijiye...

patni : suno jee, mahilaon ko bhi ab shani mandir mein pravesh ka adhikaar mil gaya hai.
pati : bahut badhiya hua, ab shani dev ko bhi maaloom padega ki saadhesaati kise kahate hain..

Dukaanadaar: kya chaahie ? Graahak: mujhe beevi se ladane ke lie taakat chaahie, himmat chaahie, akal bhi chaahie Dukaanadaar: saahab ko ek kvaartar do, soda do aur mungdaal ka Packet do paanch vaala.

Aaj ka Hindi Gyaan:
Air Hostess Havai Sundari
Nurse Davai Sundari
Lady Teacher Padhai Sundari
Naukaraani Saphai Sundari
kisi ne joda
Patni Ladai Sundari!

A Man praying in ??
Kumbh Mela...
Hey Prabhu, nyay karo...
Hey Prabhu, nyay karo...
Hamesha bhai ko bhai bichhadte hai kumbh meley main...
Kabhi pati-Patni per bhi try karo?

No comments:

Post a Comment